The Long & Winding Telephone Cable
BT are shit. I could leave it at that, but a three word intro to a class article isn't that great. So, BT are shit? Yeah. Bt are shit. BT are shit. BT are shit. BT are shit. BT are shit. BT are shit. etc.

The Complaint
Dear Sir/Madam,
                     I am writing with a complaint. When I took out my tenancy agreement in June 2004, I was immediately sent abroad to work for a year. Unfortunately, that would have meant giving up a recently acquired tenancy. I did not wish to do this, so I sub-let my property, with the agreement of the landlord, to a friend. During this time, and I have only found this out from BT, he decided to install a telephone line. I am unsure as to how this line was used, etc. But I was rather displeased when I returned to the United Kingdom and decided myself to install a telephone line, as I required a fully functioning land line for work.

During the call to BT to activate my account, I was passed to the Credit Control Department. I felt as though I was being classed as a criminal for someone elses actions, who would have thought getting a telephone service would be so difficult? The gentleman on the other end of the phone, I cannot recall his name, but he was fantastically helpful and a credit to your company. He informed me that not one, but two previous tenants had run up large bills and not paid. So, this property was effectively given a bad credit rating. I was given a service known as "Pay and Call," effectively the same as a pay-as-you-go mobile. As I spend a lot of the time on the internet, for work purposes, it's costing me a small fortune on dial-up, as I am sure you can imagine.

The last time I had a contract with BT was when I was at university, approximately four years ago. I have never required one since then. What with the recent outburst of mobile telecommunications masts in the countryside, I always relied heavily on my mobile phone. When I left my university flat, my parents paid the final bill and I subsequently repaid them. So, you have that money, yet I am still being classed as a bad debtor. I have done all that is in my power to inform various debt collecting agencies of previous tenants new whereabouts, where possible. I've effectively done all the leg work for you.

All I am asking for is a fully functioning land line with a normal quarterly bill and a broadband internet service. Is this too much to ask?

I await your reply.

Sent on behalf of a friend

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No Reply, so we sent this:

Dear Sir/Madam,

I am writing with a serious complaint regarding the theft of monies from my account by British Telecom. The amounts have been taken from my account since February 2005 and at a sum of £15.99 per month. This comes to the grand total of £143.91

As I only subscribed to a BT landline in August, and there is a bad debt against this address, due to the fault of previous tenants, I am on a “Pay & Call” service. Upon telephoning your Customer Services Helpline, they could only tell me that the amount was for a broadband service. As this telephone line, which I am currently subscribed to, doesn't support broadband. I am at a loss to know where this money has gone to.

Luckily I noticed that this months payment had been taken. I immediately informed my bank, who raised an indemnity charge against you and I managed to reclaim this £15.99 back. I am still £143.91 out of pocket.

This is no laughing matter.

If this money is not forwarded onto myself within the next fourteen days, I will not hesitate to take this matter to Otelo. When I spoke to one of your Customer Service Employees, at a call centre in India, she was very unhelpful possibly due to the language barrier.

If this matter is not satisfactorily resolved within the fourteen days, I will be contacting my solicitor to commence legal proceedings and I will ensure that the media is informed of this incident.

Yours etc.

Sent on behalf of a friend

Conclusion
This case has been firmly deposited in the hands of The Sea Turkeys, it's now down to us to find a resolve. So we called them at 7.45pm (15 minutes before they close) and created merry hell with the Customer Service representative.

Well, we don't have the technology, although we are assured it's on the way, to record telephone conversations. So, a rough transcript of this is below. Enjoy it, they admit to so much in the space of ten minutes, but they don't want to pay the money.

Cogsy: I've waited all day for my call back, no one has called me.

BT: I'm sorry, Sir. Can I just put you on hold? I need to read through your notes.

As Cogsy was put on hold, and then taken back off again, nothing exciting happened. But, there was a significant development. BT claim that Narrowband and Broadband are not admitting to the responsibility of the theft of money from Chris' bank account. So, after some amount of sweet-talking from Cogsy, they subconsciously admitted taking the money for no good reason. Cogsy, rightfully, pointed out that this was classed as theft and put to them the following statement:

So, you're admitting to the fact that you have stolen money from my account? Basically, you're admitting that your company has committed an offence?

The reply was along the lines of "Oh no, that's not what I meant... umm err...." So, now that we have managed to get BT to admit to the fact that they are thieves, all we had to do was ask for the money back. Which we did.

Unfortunately it's not as simple as that, even with our attempts to bring the media, courts and the telephone ombudsmen in. They still could only say that they'll call us back first thing the next morning. This isn't good enough.

With their offices now officially closed for the day, and despite several ultimatums being delivered to BT on different occasions, with no result. This matter is being sent, as I type this, to several national newspaper organisations.

If we can't get a satisfactory resolve from BT within 24 hours, from this point, then we'll be reading about ourselves in the national press. Nothing beats a bit of free publicity.

So, to sum up this new section. . .

BT are good at stealing your money, they don't want to give it back to you though. If you've had any problems with BT, then let us know and we'll take up your case.


COMPLAINT FAR FROM OVER
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